12) HALLELUJAH

In an old pocket I found a smoke,
A year after I quit,
And I stopped and wondered if I should,
And then I thought, “fuck it”
And I poured myself a glass of wine
And with ceremony lit it,
I thought about the time I’ve lost
Having that same old fit
The one that tells me I’m not good enough,
Though I know that I am strong,
And I’ve fought off every demon
Tried to prove me that I’m wrong,
And I’ve got a friend in every town,
And still I don’t belong,
And my best friend has always been a song,

But Hallelujah to the spirit that remains
And Hallelujah to the sound of sweet refrains,
I can pack my life into a box
And hop that same old train,
Just as long as I keep moving
Nothing’s lost
And nothing’s gained,

Well everybody’s growing up,
Time is showing on their face,
And despite the best of all advice
It still feels like a race
And I’m fine as long as I am
Being held in an embrace,
But you cannot spend forever
In one place,

And oh, Time, you are sneaky and you’re cold,
And I don’t know who scares me more,
The young ones, or the old,
It feels just like a card-game,
You can fake, or you can fold,
But there aren’t so many winners,
So I’m told,

But Hallelujah to the spirit that remains
And Hallelujah to the sound of sweet refrains,
I can pack my life into a box
And hop that same old train,
Just as long as I keep moving,
Nothing’s lost,
And nothing’s gained,

Well, that cigarette burned quickly,
And it left me wanting more,
But it wasn’t more to smoke,
I don’t know what I smoked it for
Cause it ended and I felt
Just as I had felt before,
Ceiling still above me,
And below me still the floor,
I don’t know what I’ve been expecting,
Some magical new thing,
As if I could turn around
And suddenly I’d have real wings,
I don’t know what to call this dream
That stubbornly still clings
When every day
The same old cycle brings,

But Hallelujah to the spirit that remains,
And Hallelujah to the sound of sweet refrains,
I can pack my life into a box
And hop that same old train,
Just as long as I keep moving,
Nothing’s lost,
And nothing’s gained.